As a black owned business we are pretty rare in the sexuality industry. 5 years ago I began the amazing journey of Scarlet Ladies, which is now Sonder & Beam and I can say as a black woman it is pretty lonely. Walking into events and never feeling represented, this journey did not start upon attending events but from the flyers, marketing, language used and more.
The sexuality industry is literally a white man’s/woman’s world. Is it that black women do not have sex or are just so empowered that they do not need to be part of this space? We all know that is not the case but just like everything else, the industry does not call us. When people say things like sexuality is never about race or our doors are open to all, the question should be asked. If you saw an event with only black women on the flyers, the owner was a black woman and when you arrived the speakers were all black and you were the only white woman in the room how would you feel. Will you be comfortable? Would you feel like you can connect? Would you want to attend again? It is a hard question but it is something you have to be honest with. Take that event and apply it to a whole industry from the marketing, the owners the language and so much more. Would the sex positive world feel like a welcoming place for you?
Can sex positivity ever be anti-racist and address intersectionality when there is only ever just one persons voice you are hearing? How can we bring inclusivity and encourage black women to also be part of the sex positivity space? The answer is quite simply to encourage and support more black owned businesses within the industry. Over the 5 years I have seen more WOC faces in the industry and that makes me feel so grateful. Addressing intersectionality is not about supporting businesses who say they are inclusive but supporting businesses that help amplify a diverse range of women voices and helping to strengthen their business with your money. By doing this you are actively addressing intersectionality in the sexuality industry.
There are plenty more black owned sexuality businesses but here are our favourites. Comment below to list names not listed or to share your own business.
“I became a female confidence coach because I believe in female power and can relate to the issues many of my ladies have faced. I choose the name Madam Storm, because it resonated with me because of my lifestyle as a Dominatrix, it represents my female divine power and self confidence and it sounds bloody cool!
I run a series of classes and lifestyle programmes focussed on various practical issues aimed at increasing self-confidence and projecting authority as well as femininity. The classes are delivered in a unique relaxed style appropriate to the modern young woman. They’re active, they’re engaging, they’re fun because that’s the way I am.
See Madam Storm here
Kayleigh Daniels* is a woman who owns her sexuality. Mostly.
Her writing explores the intersection of fiction, fantasy and the function of contemporary sexual fixations.
She lives – and dates – in London.
*Kayleigh Daniels is a fictional character
A not for profit, community interest company formed by Black and people of colour working in sexual and reproductive health (SRH). We came together in 2018 to increase awareness about the colonial influences on our practice.
We believe that decolonising is not just an academic idea but a solution in helping address the huge health inequalities present in SRH.
Blex is the app dedicated to strengthening melanated sex, intimacy and relationships. It helps build confidence and boost wellness to enhance your sex life, even if you’ve never had a successful relationship or love life.
The Love Erotica
We are a premium adult toy and accessories supply store based in the UK.
At Love Erotica, our mission is to provide high quality products at competitive prices to our customers.
If you do not find the product you are looking for in our store, please use the contact us section and we will be happy to search our many suppliers for that special gift for you and your partner.
Love Erotica handpicked an array of high quality premium sex tools and accessories
Founder of Sonder & Beam.