We have lots in common with each other, we are sisters after all. But some years ago I realised that I don’t go about relationships, dating and sex in quite the same way as my vanilla heterosexual sisters. I tried to work out how much of the difference was because of kink, how much was because of polyamory and how much was down to sexual orientation. In the end I realised it didn’t matter what part came from where. What matters are the differences and how they make relationships better.
We talk about sex in detail before we have sex with a new partner (and even sometimes with a longer term partner!) Kinky people tend to talk more about what they like/don’t like, want to do and don’t want to do with a potential partner before climbing into bed with them. Perhaps this is because we want to make sure that we are likely to be compatible with someone before investing in the relationship. As for LGBTQ, There is still a lot of anonymous gay sex that happens but with the wide variety of diseases including ones like the resistant strain of gonorrhea, there is some internal pressure to at least have the safe sex talk before intimacy and that often leads into a conversation about limits, what really makes me hot and what turns me off. By the time we have sex, we have likely been turned on for days if not weeks. Anticipation makes for better sex too!